i am very awkward and introverted irl, but was somehow very good at making friends in high school. this results in me having a number of people that i just don't speak to that often, but would have considered friends during the point of my life where i actually had social contact. apart from friendships, i can be quite outspoken online and in person if i'm riled up enough. i also enjoy bantering with people, and with people i'm very comfortable with (exclusively my family), i can be very affectionate in a bit of an intentionally annoying way. it's all about the bit.

you cannot be serious. can you- can you actually read? wait speaking of, how did you even GET here without finding an answer to this question??

i hope to become an animal behaviour researcher or animal ethologist at the uni i study at, or at the very least, in the same country that i am in currently. my dream would be to research tropical fish or amphibians, but all animals are kind of rad.

autism *dabs*

3 siblings, second oldest, speaks french and igbo (both to an okay-ish level), and more stuff {will expand later} also that's my fursona over there!!! well, say hello >:(

i like communism, transgenderism, coding, crocheting (SOMETIMES), FISH, and like. everything else on da home page. seriously did you not read my other pages goddamn D:

i very much DISLIKE web 3.0 and everything associated with it including NFTs and crypto and techbros. you're all very annoying <3 i also dislike trying foods without familiar components and vegetables, SORRY. kill me why don't you idc. if you don't like this blog i don't want to know!! mind ya business :3

i generally subscribe to the philosophy of absurdism, that suggests that while there is no natural meaning to life, we make meaning, and that that is inherently absurd. i learnt about this in year 12 IB english lit in which we studied albert camus's the plague, and i absolutely adored it. i've been meaning to pick it up in french to see how the meaning changes. (HA bet you thought this would be a joke answer didn't you? freak.)

as a child, i was not allowed onto social media at all. until i was 15 i had no 'normal' online presence to speak of (unless you count being a quotev author from ages 13-14 as being... normal). this meant that i grew up relatively sheltered, with only those i knew personally, surrounding me and taking up real estate in my brain and daily thoughts. perhaps i have a conservative outlook on life in this regard due to this, but as far as i am concerned, this was a relatively peaceful time of my life (at least with regards to my online life), and i strongly believe that everyone should have the option to remain relatively anonymous online, and connecting only with people that they actually know in real life, or have formed a strong connection with online. however, this quiet time of my life was to come to an end by the time i turned 15, and had a secret instagram account, hidden from my parents. suddenly, i was bombarded with the daily lives of people - that i both knew and did not know - constantly, in a perfectly curated space where every moment of my life could be scrutinised and examined to be held up to a certain unreachable standard, determined by an all-seeing algorithm. for the next 3 years, i was plagued by FOMO or the fear of missing out on events of my friends' lives, and instead of living a life i felt was true to myself, i began to curate my offline life to closely match what i saw online. and don't suggest to me that this was entirely my fault; i know we have all been told that online spaces are curated to a fault, but in the moment, it is impossible to see that. for unrelated reasons (or perhaps not entirely unrelated), i sunk into a deep depression yet i was still a slave to the algorithm, churning out content i believed others would want to see. however, i was subconsciously noticing that despite all i was doing to maximise social connections online, i was instead losing out on spending time - quality time - with friends, and becoming more and more of a shut-in.
then this year, something in me broke. perhaps it was due to the alarming rise of transphobia on social media, only a reflection of current events. perhaps it was when i was forced to transfer unis and my social interactions offline shrunk to 0, or perhaps it was just because my subconscious thoughts rose to the surface, and i realised that i would be better off removing myself entirely from algorithm based social medias. my hypothesis? a combination of this led to my conflicted mind. and then one day, i was scrolling tumblr feeling totally drained, and i happened across a post advocating users to make a neocities account and start working on a website dedicated to their wildest dreams. finally, something snapped into place, and at 5am in the morning, i opened up neocities on my precariously balanced laptop on my lap, and started a page.
the first one was a bust. i couldn't delete it though, due to only wanting to use my anonymous email on it, and so made a child website. and so, aisforaardvark was born. over the last month, i have deleted social media, using it only on a browser to keep up with friends and deleted all other social media. i have always looked back at the past, and perhaps now i will learn from my own.